I, Carmen Zammit, declare that the work presented in this thesis is, to the best of my knowledge and belief, original, except as acknowledged in the text, and that the material has not been submitted, either in whole or in part, for a degree at this or any other university.

DEDICATION

This work is dedicated to Michael

ABSTRACT

This thesis aimed primarily to describe my experience of dying. A second consideration was to describe the impact on family, friends and others. My initial objective was to write down my experiences in response to the many questions and concerns raised by family members and friends. I believed they were interested in making more informed decisions about their lives and treatments should they themselves be diagnosed with a life-threatening illness. I wanted to give a true account and accurate information, which in the first instance might help my own genetic family. Beyond this, I hoped to reach those interested parties, who would benefit from this information and knowledge, particularly those who themselves were diagnosed with a life-threatening illness, and those at risk of doing so. My hope was that it would also help their partners and carers, both personal and professional, to also know and understand the experience, so that they could give the support that comes from knowledge and empathy

This Reflective Topical Autobiography (RTA) comprises a trajectory of events and reflections, documented chronologically, to capture the detail of my life journey, in relation to my cancer diagnosis. The images and stories portraying my life journey with cancer include works entitled: Origins, My Family, My Culture, Rag Doll, The Demon Within, The Silent Scream, The Fighter, Feather Inscape, Slipping Away, Living Horror, Mother, Morphine, Heart of Peace, Living in the Shadows, Cancer (Mis)information, and Withdrawing/Emerging. Accompanying reflections provide insights into the creation of the images and how I have come to interpret them and make sense of my experience of dying.

This RTA fulfils most or all of these aims and objectives, some of which can only be realised over time, as people resonate with my work and personal insights into what it is to experience dying, as an immediate and ever present reality

CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION 
Introduction 
Significance 
Aim 
Objectives 
The Researcher’s Background: My Mother, Myself 
Definition of Key Terms 
Thesis Chapters

CHAPTER TWO: LITERATURE REVIEW
Introduction 
Biomedicine
Bioethical Considerations 
Pharmaceutical Biotechnology 
Biomedicine, Cancer and Australia’s Health
Complementary and Alternative Medicine
Summary 

CHAPTER THREE: METHODOLOGY, METHODS AND PROCESSES
Reflective Topical Autobiography 
The RTA Method 
Data Analysis 
Limitations 
The reliability of (or the ability to replicate) the research findings 
A value-free, objective science 
The ability to generalise the research findings to the larger population
Methods and Processes 
Ethical considerations 
The Autobiographical Methods and Processes 
Choosing RTA
Choosing a topic
Immersion
Data collection
Incubation
Illumination
Contemplation 
Writing the RTA
Criteria for Ensuring the Quality and Effectiveness of the Project 
Summary 

CHAPTER FOUR: MY REFLECTIVE TOPICAL AUTOBIOGRAPHY
Introduction 
The Sequence of Events 
Perth, Western Australia 
The Lump
Surgery
Oncology 
Northern Rivers, New South Wales
The Fall 
The Local Doctor
The Oncologist
The Private Hospital 
The Public Hospital 
The Hospice 
At Home 

The Images and Stories 
Origins 
My Family, My Culture 
Rag Doll 
The Demon Within 
The Silent Scream 
The Fighter 
Feather Inscape 
Slipping Away 
Living Horror 
Mother 
Morphine 
Heart of Peace 
Living in the Shadows 
Cancer (Mis)information 
Withdrawing/Emerging 

Summary 

TABLES

Table 2.1 Therapeutic Areas and Investigational Drugs 

Table 2.2 Complementary and Alternative Medicine 

Table 4.1 Timeline of Events 

REFERENCES